jacob promised to show me how to add photos so it's all more exciting. it's been over one month since i last updated, altho i jot things on facebook and text messages enough. i think i'd be a good candidate for a technology fast. when my cell phone isn't nearby, i develop a nervous tick. when i can't check email for more than 2 consecutive days, i feel ill. i think a lot has to do with acclimating to a new city and environment. in san francisco i never worry about staying in touch, it just happens. in L.A. it's vastly different. after 2 months, i still feel like a very small fish.

i started work a few weeks ago, at an upscale gyno-clinic/spa in Santa Monica. I ship and receive expensive vitamins for bourgie ladies. it's very part time, and while i am still looking for another job to fill in the gaps, i like my boss a lot and appreciate that i found something stable. many of our patients are filthy rich and covered with plastic body parts. they behave in an entitled manner. i don't like it. i feel as if i would be better off if i could stand people like this, but i can't.

a good friend visited this weekend, and she mentioned that she'd feel too cynical, living here.i agree with her, i feel the cynic in me often, wanting to shake certain people and ask them if they're for real. not just the bourgies that come to my job, but all the westside folks. but i love the angelenos(?) too sometimes. they are carefree. i came here to learn some of that.

so who knows? i don't feel as lonely as i used to. tho i really miss san francisco. and i dream about new york constantly. maybe 30 is too old to move to La-La land? i had so many crazy adventures, in multiple states and even countries, prior to moving here. i want to experience new beautiful things, but before, i treated that like everything had to be wild and unsustainable. i am past that. we've started attending monday night meditations w/ noah levine at the santa monica zen center. it's pretty awesome. i even ran into someone i know from philly. rad!

there's lots more to say, but i'm considering deleting this altogether. part of me really wants to stay transparent around the acclimating process, but another part feels it's no one's business. i guess it's a good place to stop for today. but i will say this: the rabbit is really happy here. he's growing out of his mind w power. he tries to tackle the garbage can on a daily basis, and basically hops into our laps whenever he wants. he will also lick dirty clothes for hours if allowed. sigh.